2009...

I promised Bee i wud start blogging again so here i'm iz!!! {P.S. Bee no 1 can comment on ur blogs which iz prolly y u dnt have any comments lol}

I swear this gone be mah year! I've had the best start 2 this year than I've eva had. Spent tha 1st 4 dayz of tha year with tha love of mah life!! Our situation duz'n allow us 2 be 2getha like normal, but regardless, we're still very much in love! Yes we have our normal fights {distance duz'n change the arguments @ all lol}. But I love him & i kno this iz real. And it's crazy cuz most wuda sed "f it", threw in tha towel eons ago. But I guess wen u really love sum1, distance don't mean a thing. I don't feel far away 4rm him @ all. We jus realized tha otha day I been reppin tha chi evn b4 i knew anything about him or tha chi {lol}. But I kno that he's it & I'm so glad that I finally found a winner! Skip u losers that hurt me in tha past. Honestly, I gotta thank them 4 preparing mah heart 4 a relationship like this. He literally iz mah everything & I kno many people say it all the time how they can't picture life without a certain sum1, but I mean it with everything. He is mah otha half. Swear it!!!

On 2 mah frenz. I swear I love em & even tho Bee is leavin me {even tho she sed she was staying lol} I kinda feel like it's wats best 4 her. I kno that a new start in a new year will give her a new insight on love. She'll realize she won't have 2 make one-sided changez. I kno how u feel about JJ {look @ mah abbreviations lol}, but the change wud occur 2gether, not separately. I hope you don't give up on love, cuz it iz one of theee best feelings in tha world...wen it's real...wen it's right! In time, honey...in time.

So happy 4 wifey and Dee. I kno it ain't been easy 4 none of us tryna find tha real & sumtimes u think u want sumthin & realize that u already had wat u needed!

Umm...workin 2 jobs like a single parent wit 4 kids as Bee wud say. Lol...nah it's finally calmed down...I'm jus so glad that God has blessed me enough 2 have 2. And one iz a good job 2 {lol}!

This is y I'm sayin 2009 is mah year, fa sho!!! I'm happy & I'm in love...wat better combination?!

~*~Mrs. Amillie~*~

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changez!!!!

Man...sometimes change can be so f'n hard. It can be really good, but it's soooooo hard! I don't want any of mah frenz 2 leave me! But, thas life & we're gonna go our separate ways eventually. It's jus...u don't think that far ahead wen ur frenz. Ur like, "oh she's always gonna be around." And then, one day it finally hits u that as we get older we're gonna do different things. And that really makes me sad. Life is crazy. And as u gain one thing--for instance...I've gained love {real love}--u lose another...a really good fren. And even tho u kno u'll always be frenz...it sucks cuz they won't be there wen u jus wanna go visit them @ work {or sumthin like that} wen u jus feel like it. It's really sad 2 think on. And sumtimes u jus wanna be in denial, but u gotta come 2 the realization that things ARE gonna change whether u want them 2 or not. So, I jus hop on board & give "big ups" 2 mah girls! I love them whether we talk everyday or once every 2 months. They're are the best. And I kno that once I MAKE IT BIG IN THE INDUSTRY they'll have no choice but 2 be around. LMBO! Cuz, wifey gone be assistant...duh! lol! And Bee, Dee, Si, Lama & Si...I don't kno...haven't thot that far in advance. LOL! But, jus kno that ya'll gone be wit me every step of the way! LOL! I love ya'll...KNO THIS!!!

BeEN gOnE 4 A mINutE...

Where hav i been??? Nowhere...jus not on blogger. Besides...like a re re i 4got my e-mail cuz i hadn't been on here in so long and it kinda jus popped n2 my head. So.....here i iz!! Lol...

But wat i hav been dealin wit is whiny ex's--i'm so not goin there rite now...i'm not even tryna be cool wit that dude NO MORE!!! Get ova it...i dnt want u nemore...deal wit it. So, ur not my world nemore?? U had me, lost me, ur bad. But newayz...i'm ova that.

Next!!!

4 some reason me & my love jus cant catch a break on this relationship thing. We're like so in love but we keep gettin hit 4rm every angle. It's so not fair...we already hav the whole distance thing & on top of that we got all this bs!!! I mean, regardless i'ma be his cuz I AM his...but it's like "come on!!" i'll get ova it...i'm jus havin a moment...

But, in spite of all that I'm actually really happy!! I mean, I'm in love, gettin a promotion @ work {thinkin of gettin a holiday job tho...lol}, lovin my frenz, family is, well...family :-). I'm more than good.

So...thas the update...i'll be blogging more often again...i kinda missed it. PLUS...I gotta sidekick {4rm the ex...about the only good thing I got 4rm him...ha ha!}.

*kisses :-p*

Close That Chapter...

Close that book!!! {who kno's wat thas from??? lol}

So, I've finally got the closure that I've been dying 2 get. I must give a special thanks to Eb 4 puttin' me on 2 that special song by Mrs. Carter {funny how everyone is calling her that now, like her marry'n him is wat makes her...lol}. Anywho...I listened 2 that song and realized how NOT over the way mah ex hurt me. I listened 2 it--literally--a thousand and one times {well, maybe not literally...but u get mah point}. And I cried. 4 like the 1st time since we ended...I confronted mah feelings. Wen we ended {4 good} I jus said "f" it and I wanted 2 move on; play the role...be the bad girl. But, things never go as planned. I ended up falling in love. And yes, he's done TONS of stupid things, but now that he's really trying, I'm letting mah unresolved issues wit mah ex hurt our chances of actually working out.

So, with that said, I finally talked 2 him. Heard his story, which I wish he woulda jus said from the start. It's so funny, tho. I've always jus talked about how dumb boys are and they jus don't care who they hurt...but I've learned 2day {and as wifey says} "there's always a story." I mean there's always a reason why they are as stupid as they are {lmbo}. It's jus truth. But, now that I kno, it jus makes it easier 4 me 2 accept. And now I can fully move on and not hold unfair, bitter feelings towards mah love!

I'm happy. I feel really good! Cuz I've finally...

Closed that chapter...Closed that book!!!

the classics...

i've always loved movies but now i think im fallin in love wit the oldies. and no i dont mean the 80's or even the 70's...the real classics...they're so good. i love the way they talk lol...

"THE" Ex

Quick Snippet:
*I love mah wifey: {i gotta be her rock now since I'm at a point that she's not...and I don't mind that at all cuz she's been mine more than I can count}
*I love mah Bee: {I can't imagine life without her...she's mah heart}
*I love all mah frenz: {God seriously gave me the best}

Anywho...on 2 "THE" Ex...

It's important 2 kno that there is always that one person in ur life that will be "THE" ex...aside from every other former bf/gf that u've had, there will always only be one that, in any convo that u have wit anyone, they kno exactly who ur talkin about wen u say my ex...lmbo!

Well as far as "THE" ex...he's movin back to the D...and yes, of course, he's tryna get back in. I mean, why?!? Seriously. I did everything 4 this boy, LITERALLY took care of him and he jus did me soooooo wrong {as is the story of a nigga...lol}. But, now he's text'n me and calling me allll the time. I mean...that use 2 be me {wen we weren't 2gether}...and now it's flipped 2 him. And it's so not normal 4 me. I mean, it's not like he outright said, "Cristal, I want u back." But, of course he wouldn't. I jus kno him...I kno him. And I kno he's tryna get back.

I made a mistake of tellin him of a problem that me and mah love were having--well, not a mistake...i jus thot we were frenz, ya kno--and he basically told me 2 break up wit him; that i should "Do me..." lol...goodness, these boyz! Wat is it wit them. Why can I be a fren 2 him, but he can't be the same 2 me. I've been there, where I was the ex tryna give him advice about his OTHER GIRLS and tryin not 2 be jealous at the same time...but I'm not there anymore and I wish he could understand that I love mah love...and I don't want him back...

I still love him, 4 sure. but I'm no longer in love with him...of course he'll try 2 act as if he doesn't want me back, but like I said, thas a nigga 4 u...we'll see how this plays out!

~MISS Petite~

BOY STOP?!?!

I'm sorry but i jus have to post this convo between me and this boy on facebook. I don't get boys...wat is really wrong wit them. I swear they mental. I haven't talked 2 this boy in TWO YEARS and this is wat he come at me wit:

Dumb Nigga:

September 29 at 6:04pm

How have u been?

Cristal Nicole:

September 29 at 7:21pm

wow...i been good...u?

Dumb Nigga:

September 29 at 10:53pm

Im doing fine. Surprised bout sumthin?

Cristal Nicole:

September 29 at 11:38pm

lol...wateva...u kno wat im surprised about...wat made u write me??

Dumb Nigga:

September 30 at 1:55am

It was weird but i was thinkin bout u

Cristal Nicole:

September 30 at 7:43am

aww u was thinkin about me lol...why is that weird? lol so wat were u thinkin about

Dumb Nigga:

September 30 at 2:54pm

Jus wondering what u had been up to. Was wondering y we couldnt get along when i no i liked u. Also was wonderin how the celibate life was. All that!

Cristal Nicole

September 30 at 6:56pm

lol...all that huh...i mean i been good. livin life as best i can and...i couldn't tell u why we aint get along i guess we were jus too alike...and as far as the celibacy thing...well i have a boyfren so wateva u take from that

Dumb Nigga:

Today at 5:35am

Its time to cheat bcuz i wanna take u out

Cristal Nicole

Today at 7:56am

o wow {dumb nigga...lol}...i dont kno about that...im definitely not a cheater...and why do i have 2 cheat jus 4 u 2 take me out

I mean, seriously....wat be goin thru these dudes heads?!?! I need 2 kno now. 2 years and I dropped u..and now all of a sudden u want me 2 drop mah boo 4 u....lets use common sense now...really!!!!