FITS OF A SLEEPLESS NIGHT...

i wonder how many sleepless nights i've had in my lifetime all because of love. not that im blaming love 4 who i fell 4, jus simply sayin. it seems i've been here more than i should hav. and i wish there was a way 2 avoid this. but, as i kno, and anyone else who's ever suffered from heart break, i kno i must go thru this.

a thousand thots race thru my head and i wonder is this my punishment 4 falling in love. i wonder, is this the benefit. i swear i hear a million times over that he's not worth my tears, it's his loss, it'll get better and so forth. and trust me that i kno all these things already but that doesn't mean my tears will stop fallin and it doesn't mean i'll accept it better because he didn't deserve me {I mean, who does, really??}, and it surely doesn't make the time pass any faster knowin that it will get better. and trust me wen i say im no where near pessimistic. i mean u would think that after all the heart ache i've experienced that i would throw my hands up, say f it and be bitter as eva. but im not...im very optimistic but more so realistic! life does a number on u. changes u. grows u up....changes u. i dunno. i guess this is jus...fits of a sleepless night!!!